Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Celebrating victory, when you need a victory...waiting.

She had a placenta tear and bleeding and trauma. Her baby and her in jeopardy. And I prayed almost every day and sometimes twice a day. I prayed for hope, healing, and for protection. A few weeks later,victory: 7cm to 5cm and then the tear gone! A few weeks bleeding. No danger. And my heart is bursting with praise and joy and I want to shout to the world that the Lord hears us. That sometimes he truly DOES heal! That life isn't all about trials. We have triumphs too!

Somehow, even in my joy in this miracle for my friend, I am finding joy in a healing that hasn't occurred. Well, maybe not yet. See, I am waiting for healing for my hubby. I am at the point of begging for mercy, for answers, to not feel lost. We want to quit playing Russian Roulette with his health. It is hard to watch my spouse suffer with headaches, nausea and other discomforts and not know what God is doing, but I still have joy in what God is doing.
   As Eileen Pollinger says in her book, Building Christian Discipline...we look forward expectantly that God will do something. We are holding back from solving the problem ourselves...we don't have a solution anyways.
We are at our weakest: waiting for God to move.  We have done some research and seen doctors with no real hope in those systems. We've talked to friends with similar symptoms and seen God use them.
Perhaps it is wheat intolerance? Some other allergy? We can only ponder and wonder in our waiting.

We are available and ready for when the answer comes and it might not be the answer we hope for, but I feel closer to my husband more than ever. I am exercising and joyfully fulfilling my helpmate role. This is good, so good for our marriage. 

We need a victory and it will come, but oh how hard waiting is, huh?

Your turn: What victory are you celebrating, what victory do you need and are waiting for?

1 comment:

  1. Made me tear up a little bit ... celebrating, hoping and waiting, too. Thanks for sharing your heart and encouraging me to keep hoping and waiting! Hugs!


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