The Thickets: A tale of setting boundaries.

Once upon a time when miles of forest still existed, lived the Thickets. A small family in a small house deep in the heart of the trees. Each day, the Thickets gave thanks for what they had and rarely wanted more. Even a crumb was thought of and given so kindly to the little injured bird who called the Oak tree to the right of the cottage home.
    The Thickets made do with what they had, foraging, hunting, preserving and not wasting anything. They had no mailbox, cell phone, T.V., or even a computer. If they desired to converse with neighbors, they had to walk the crooked path that followed the creek and meet in person.

One day, Mrs. Thicket was feeling lonely. All the other thickets had gone exploring to find something new and Mrs. Thicket really needed to share her heart. She decided to follow the crooked path parallel to the creek to see if she would run into Mrs. Ravine or Ms. Birch, but she didn't. Where was everyone? I usually run into someone eventually, she thought. She strode a few miles farther to the vast meadow just beyond the forest and began to descend down the hill.
       She gasped when she saw the strangest trees and the chaos before her. Each tree seemed blue-gray with the sky painted on them. There were people everywhere rushing to and fro, but they were not speaking to one another nor were they even looking at each other. Instead, she noticed strange, rectangular objects of various sizes in their hands. Everyone was intently interested in these odd items. So much so that they would look up for a mere second to not bump into one another, but they would quickly return to the creature attached to their hands.
 
Mrs. Thicket saw Ms. Birch and gently tapped her shoulder only to be halted with Ms. Birch's pointy finger. Mrs. Thicket waited and waited and waited. She sighed. She was losing patience. She did not understand what was so much more important than a friend that she should have to wait to even be acknowledged. Finally, Ms. Birch looked up and said, "Oh, hi Ann. I am so sorry, but I must really get back home. Maybe I can text you tomorrow?"
  "Text", Ann asked? Before Ann could get a straight answer, Ms. Birch was already heading back to the forest. Feeling confused and noticing the beautiful, red sky approaching, Mrs. Thicket knew she needed to get home since she didn't bring a candle to light her way.
 
When she arrived home, Ann's eyes widened in disbelief! There in her quiet home, was Mr. Thicket and her two children dragging and punching their fingers across those rectangular thing-a-ma-bobs!!
No one looked up to greet her. It was if she was invisible. She thought to herself, I am going to get to the bottom of this. I will not be ignored.
     She raised her voice with frustration, "What is going on?" The other Thickets jumped and looked up quickly at mama.
    Mr. Thicket said, "Oh, hi dear. Look what we found today in the woods. Mr. Ravine called them cell phones and they have this interesting ability called, internet. We can communicate with people without ever having to walk and talk to them in person. Isn't that great?"
  
Ann didn't want to lose her temper so with firm compassion she said, "No, it is not great. I feel sad that when trying to communicate with my friend, Ms. Birch or my family, I was barely acknowledged. Today, just beyond the meadow I saw the most terrible and tragic truth. I witnessed people dismissing each other. Children playing on these contraptions instead of dressing up their dolls, or making forts or building sleeping bags from leaves for caterpillars. I saw people not even stopping to see the most gorgeous sunset!"

The Thickets didn't defy the modern times by giving up their devices, but Mr. Thicket per Mrs. Thicket kind request, set specific boundaries that severely limited the days and amount of time on these modern phones. THEY NEVER missed another sunset after that!


Happily linking up with a great sisterhood: Soli Deo Gloria, come join us here
   

WANTED: 50 and older because you ARE that important...

If you are 50 and older, I have to tell you how important you are to me...to the world. To those of us currently without our grandparents or mothers (me) or we have a very strained relationship with our dad (me, again).

Perhaps, you don't desire to be a mother, grandparent, etc. to non-family around you, but before you hang up your hat on that, let me tell you how valuable you really are (not including how God sees you which you gotta ask him about that).

There are those of us that need, no-crave your wisdom, insight, affection, heck, even your attention. You possess a stability. Deep down, we know you didn't live the first 50 years without trials! Your strength from having made it through needs to be told. We need those stories of triumph and heartache to inspire and encourage us to keep going.

Most of you are parents and although we don't likely desire unsolicited advice on parenting, we still need your support, we desperately seek your understanding and yes, your free babysitting availability!

Some of us really love that you make getting older seem charming and less scary. When I look at how you handle gray hairs, a few extra pounds or pesky wrinkles-an awe escapes my lips and I breathe a bit easier. Getting old is not the end of life...

I've heard on more than one occasion from you, 

"I loved turning 50. I felt like my life was truly beginning."

I don't know what that means so I need you to explain it. And if your life is truly beginning-does that mean you stop being engaged or involved with youth? With young adults or a 39 year old like me?

Please tell me the answer is no! We need you! We need you...to listen without judgement. To not talk down to us because we aren't where you are at and please don't dismiss us! Okay, some don't show you the respect you so deserve, but don't give up on us. We need your love.

Let me tell you how you impact the world with examples from my experiences...

1. She isn't my grandmother, but my Mamaw was her best friend. She is 80 something, her health is declining and yet, she still  traveled out of state to come meet my children! The gesture alone...as I type this, tears are hanging in my eyes. (Love. Sacrifice).

2. She sees me differently than I thought. She has taught for 25+ years. An amazing, wise, now retired teacher. She told me, "You taught me so much." Huh? How could I teach her? She showed me ways to improve my teaching...surely not the other way around? (Encouragement. Humility).

3. They treated me like their grandchild. They paid for my college bill so I could get a Masters in Education. THEY loved me and even when they had cancer...they asked about me! She stroked my head and hand despite suffering. In pain, she wasn't just thinking about herself.

(Love, truly selfless love. Mercy. Generosity).

4. When my mother died, they swooped in with hugs, open ears and they came to her funeral. They barely knew her. They let me cry even if it made them uncomfortable. They have prayed over me and for me. She has spoken scripture to me more than once. They are there for birthdays and just because moments too. They are amazing in-laws and wonderful grandparents to my children.

 (Hope, kindness, love, compassion, inspiration. Examples of godliness).

5. She is my best friend's mom, but she treats me like I am one of hers. She writes me letters. She tells me I am a good mom. She makes me laugh and she has seen me grow from an awkward middle- schooler to a woman. She loves me. (Acceptance, forgiveness, love and understanding).

6. My home wasn't always safe. Her home was. She offered it. She didn't ask for details or something in return...she just opened her door and heart. (Safety. Comfort. Refuge.).

 Did you catch how prevalent love was in my experiences? 

It is hard to put into words how much these people's actions both verbal or not have meant to me.

If you are 50 and older and reading this-get and stay involved. Know that what you are doing matters. Please serve. Whether that means doing something like vacation Bible school, or Sunday school, watching our kids for a day or more, caring for kids at MOPS, offering your home as a place of safety and refuge for those whose homes aren't safe and or simply just listening.

We need you...really we do! 

And...thank you!

Sharing this post over at Jen's wonderful blog,  Soli De Gloria

Always room for one more...

Want to do something different on your blog? Try the exercise below and go here to learn more and join Lisa-Jo's fun community!

Writing five minutes on the word: Friend

There's always room for one more friend...at least in my heart. I don't believe one more is just too much. I just know this me needs a variety of personalities to stretch me, love me, "get me", encourage me and be okay with this definition of me. 

I met and made a friend, finally after being in this Colorado city for two years and now God is moving her family 4 hours away to Denver. Her name is Morgan. She so gets me.

I want to throw...okay I have thrown a bit of a fit because I am going to miss my new friend. But, instead of writing to pout, I am going to tell you why I will miss having her here in my life daily.

Morgan writes a blog (go here http://snapshots-morgan.blogspot.com/) and she writes pre-teen stories and well, she just writes well. She understands why I write. She kept me accountable when I didn't want to send my children's stories that I wrote in...

           Morgan knows how to encourage and you feel that she cares about you.

You feel that momma love that she so readily displays to her four beautiful children.

She inspires me to be that kind of momma.

Morgan GETS my humor...no, really, I-don't-have-to-explain my self and she doesn't shift uncomfortably at my odd way of seeing things because she sees them and she plays right along. Sometimes she is the one cracking me up.

Morgan knows God and her family, her husband do too. And they are moving because God wants them too and he is providing a career shift for hubby...and they trust God, they pray to him, and they know him. And I get that because that is why we are here on the west side of Colorado instead of on the east...

I trust God for my friend, but I am going to miss her!

I hope God brings me another friend like Morgan soon...there's always room for one more.

31 Days to Grace (Day 21): On being safe with someone

Oh the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe 

with a person,

having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, 

but pouring them all right out, just as they are,

chaft and grain together.

Certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them,

keep what is worth keeping and with a breath of kindness

blow the rest away.

-Dinah Craik

I can only count on one hand with a finger leftover of people whom I feel this safe with...and that is God's grace too. 

Thank you Andrea for this beautiful gift.

31 Days to Grace (Day 10): "Besties"

"Bestie"...a word meaning best friend. I've got two (Viviane and Andrea)...working on four if I have my way (wink). 

Bestie #1: Viviane (left in picture)

     25 years ago, in seventh grade, I asked her to sit at my table in the cafeteria. Only God knew we would be so close. She knows things about me that could be used against me in a court of law...or a terrorist situation. This is why we must remain friends.

Bestie #2: Andrea (right)

I met her at church. I couldn't believe she got me. Instantly, I knew we were going to be friends. Seven years later...Ya know that friend that you can be inappropriate with and no legalism creeps in? Yep, she's that kind of friend. We all need one don't we?

Besties come before workouts, sleep or dare I say it, coffee. Sometimes besties are all that keep you sane in this world. Often, they are the only people who give you grace when the judging comes. When the fingers are pointing. With besties, you just don't have to explain yourself.

My two best friends fall into the above category and more. What makes them special to me is not just their loyalty, but the fact that my tantrums, my weeping, my moping or bad, crabgrass kind of days never scare them off. Their grace comes in the form of forgiveness and understanding.

  

I am free to be me with God and with them. How lucky am I? What grace!

31 Days to Grace (Day 9): When She Hurts

 When she hurts, I hurt.

I can't tell you what is hurting her. I won't even tell you her name. What I can tell you is that she is a dear friend and in the midst of horrific news I left her. Not because I wanted to, but I had no choice. I don't live near her anymore. I had to drive home with a heavy heart. I prayed for her with tears. I held her hand before I drove off and tried to extend some form of grace. I sputtered words of sorrow. Told her that no matter what happened that God loved her...to remember that...I prayed while gaining 200 extra miles on my car. I begged for mercy.

What was even more cruel was that at first there was hope that what seemed to be was not going to be and I thanked the Lord. Shortly before I arrived home, the dreaded news came a second time.
Twice? The same news twice. Why?

I can only imagine the thoughts, the whys, the questions and the pain of my friend. I have never experienced this before. I have no idea how it really affects her.

 I only know how to pray and listen. I can't fix this and it tears me apart to feel and hear her heart breaking. 

Lord, I don't understand your plan for my friend. I don't even know what to pray. Please hold her as she grieves. Help her to hold onto your promises and most importantly to you.

Linking up today with  the SDG awesome bloggers @www.findingheaventoday.com

The "M" word: Monument Moment

Andrea, Heather and I at the Monument.

My duo of merry women came to visit me this past weekend. I feel so lucky to have such great friends who would trek the Rocky Mountains to come see me.

They were here to encourage me, but I think we took turns encouraging each other. I made them authentic Indian dishes and we all ate til' it hurt. In that same moment we laughed til' it hurt too. Oh, the joy of girlfriends!

We went to the Colorado National Monument and well...the time there was monumental! No pun intended really. There were occasions of silence, silliness, prayer, even singing! I hadn't seen either of them since October. I realized how much I missed being able to just be me with them.

So...there were bits of tree and rock humor.

A few minutes of Kung-Foo with the sun was necessary at one point. 

Then, Heather and I just needed to JUMP! Might as well Jump...think popular eighties song.