The Cons of Home School

#3 Write a post that begins and ends with the same sentence.

Home school: Where you get to be a student for another 13 years!

 I know our family chose to home school so there is no one to blame, but ourselves! Read: I get to do school all over again. I did my time. I did my job as a kid/weirdo middle schooler/hormonal teenager. Maybe I am a perpetual academic type or maybe I am secretly torturing myself. Either way...

There are cons to home schooling and I am not too cowardly to share them:

1. Sometimes explaining how to and why we diagram sentences is about as much fun as an ingrown toenail. Hmmm, is that a adjective or an adverb? Yes, I taught English as a second language and literacy for six years, but the plethora of rules/exceptions in our language just blows.  

2. Being asked, "How do you socialize your kids?" I don't. We only let them out of their cage for food, bathing and school. You didn't take that last line seriously, right?

3. There are no tax dollars provided to educate or feed my sons.

4. I love my children, but sometimes being around them makes this Christian woman consider checking in with a psychiatrist on the condition of my mental health.

5. The myth that home school children are always wide-eyed, eager and enthusiastic about learning whatever and that they sit super still, listen attentively and never-ever tap their pencil...Um, not just no, but...

6. I am the teacher of all subjects (even the ones I struggled with while in school), the counselor, lunch lady, nurse, truancy officer, referee, principal, and sometimes curriculum writer for my sons. I am only qualified by law to be a teacher. Oh, and lest not forget I am the mom (this creates all sorts of conflicts of interests). By the way, I am a decent lunch lady!

No, I am not asking you to feel sorry for me. I really do love this home school journey. There are many, plenty of beautiful benefits, blessings, memories and no regrets to teaching my sons at home. One of my favorite memories is I taught them how to read and it was an incredible experience I am glad I now possess. Yet, there are cons to everything. Insert the cliche: bittersweet.

So for those frustrating moments or weeks, I am reminded of another con of home school: 

Where you get to be a student for another 13 years!

The Feminine Needs Aisle Scam!

1. Write a blog post in exactly eight lines

Is it wrong that when I strolled down the "Feminine Needs" aisle I was expecting more than pads and tampons?

I was hoping for a massage therapist, chocolate, gourmet coffee, books, my best girlfriends to share in the fortune and the modern Captain America and Thor.

All in one skinny section of the food market.

Of course, that didn't happen. I was so disappointed!

Really, my grocery store should rename the section "Once a month, inconvenient, annoying, embarrassing products for women."

Okay, that would be too long, but would it hurt to just call it what it is for once?

Why kill my desires with deceiving titles?

Just saying!


Linking up today with a fun blogger over at  Mamas Losin It

A years of No Posts...

I have not written for a whole year! I know, why keep a blog? I was not done with it, but the past year (2016) and a half for our family has not been all easy breezy. I also needed a break from feeling pressured to just write anything so that others who so kindly read my ramblings would not quit my blog.

My dad had a stroke this June. My husband had an accident, surgery, tests and more surgery all in 2016.

It is easy to write when you are not distracted. Sure, I had material to write about, but I just couldn't do it.

My point is that I plan to return and write here again starting this August. I am in the process of considering making changes to the blog. Thank you if you have kept following me. I appreciate it more than words can express.

EDS: Ehlers Danlos Syndrome-What you talkin' about Willis?

Both my husband and son have been diagnosed with a once thought rare condition called Ehlers Danlos Syndrome or EDS for short. I have to share this story because MANY people have it and do not even know it. They need to know what it is since it can be debilitating and even deadly...

 Around the age of four, I noticed my son's ankles. They drooped in towards each other. It looked bizarro, and wrong, so at age 6, I finally took him to the doctor. And she referred him to a pediatric orthopedic. I figured this doctor would look at his ankles, measure his height, ya know, go through the typical procedures and routine. Then, offer us an explanation and a solution. Uh, nope. Bigger deal than weird ankles.

She looked at him from head to toe. Asked a billion questions and then preceded to tell me, "Your son has Scolios and I am recommending he be checked by a geneticist for EDS." ...Silence, confusion...huh? Say what? 
 She let me know (very respectfully and gently) what in the world EDS was and the concerns and the best place to get information. We took an x-ray of his back and it confirmed the Scolios. We had to go get his feet molded for inserts he will have to wear for the rest of his life. 

Before I tell you what EDS is in case you don't know, I will be honest...I was shocked, wanted to panic/worry, and melt into a puddle on the floor, but I kept it together long enough to break down a bit at home. Then, after much prayer and with renewed strength/faith in the Lord, I was on a mission to help my sweet boy!

Ehlers Danlos Syndrome is a genetically inherited disease that effects all connective tissues, think joints/tendons, etc. Those who have the disease don't produce collagen so their joints are very loose. There are 6 major types and my son and husband (who passed on the syndrome) have Hyper-mobility Type. This means they can do cool party tricks with their body (think double-jointed which is actually what EDS is). 
On a serious note, it really means a life time of fighting your body! It can cause random pain, chronic pain, dislocations, trapped and or stretched nerves, sprains/strains and muscle tears as well as other physical problems to the point of not being able to use parts of their bodies. One can injure themselves just through ordinary activities.  EDS has been called the invisible disease and here is why...

What is really hard is that those with EDS look normal and healthy on the outside so people have acted like my family is making this up and many doctors have misdiagnosed my husband, ignored the diagnosis or worse told us it was "all in our heads."

However, many people have believed us and been supportive and that is huge when you are facing something daunting like a diagnosis.  
Sometimes it is hard to swallow the blows of living in a fallen, imperfect world, but I am finding that as I have placed this crazy EDS in God's hands, I have been better at supporting, advocating and being compassionate towards my husband and son. This answer, although not one any of us want, has brought so much understanding to past peculiar injuries and physical problems my husband has had in the past. 

I know God is carrying my family gently through each day, week and month that EDS makes itself known that it is still there. The greatest reaction I can have is giving every part of this to our Lord Jesus and in return he meets me right where I am...and yet, where I am moves and changes...my respect, my reverie, my understanding who he really is grows.
  
To learn more about Ehlers Danlos Syndrom go to Edsawareness.com 
and or  www.ednf.org

Happily linking up with Jen and other sweet sisters at  http://www.findingheaventoday.com/p/about-soli-deo-gloria.html
                                        
 






 

Writer's Workshop...defining emotions in pictures...

Thank goodness for Kat Bouska's Writing Workshop...let's just say my motivation for blog writing lately has been practically zilch.
Want to join the movement? Follow it all @ Mama's Losin It

Prompt #2...Define goodness...joy...sorrow...and anger in pictures I have taken.

Goodness.

Strawberry ice cream popsicle? Goodness.

JOY

Maybe you're thinking how in the world is the below picture joy?

Well...because my house is filled with Star Wars!
Okay, yes that is joyful, but really what brings me joy is the gift of my two sons who just happen to like Star Wars as much as me!

Sorrow

The grass is crying.

All by itself.

A lonely place indeed.

That's how sorrow has been for me, a lonely place.

Anger

"He had it coming."

This really only covers a few of my emotions ya know, but that is another post for another day.

My Last Post...in 2014

Yep, the last day of 2014. I figured I should say something...but what?

This has been a year of physical trials. Especially for some of my family...food issues, body issues, physical findings while examining a different physical dilemma and an impending diagnosis. Hard, hard and more hard. At some point this shall pass, we know God is faithful and trustworthy and we are depending on him for rest, help, answers and strength. We will have some sort of victory. I can feel it and I believe it. And despite the diagnosis, we will love and support the ones who need it.

Also I should say, I am in love with my children, I feel adored by my husband, I am more than grateful for getting to home school my boys and be at home with them.
I still have the blessings of best friends and wonderful in-laws. 
My sister and I got to see each other after 5 years of not being face to face.

I will be going into 2015 a bit changed. So good not to be stagnant in my walk with the Lord or who I am becoming...

Goodbye 2014. 

(A few beautiful things from this year)

Please don't copy photos without permission

I made this ornament for my tree this year.

Playing with my food.

A birthday request I couldn't resist so I piped Hulk and Darth Maul...interesting combo, I know.

15 years!

Today, it is exactly 14 days until Christmas and I am celebrating 15 years of marriage with my sweet hubby!

Several moves, a career change, babies, deaths, surgeries and staying home have all been a portion of our journey together. What a wonderful ride it has been!

A recent photo of us on an adventure.

When 1 Thessalonians 5:18 resonates...

We all know it's that time of year where Turkeys have no idea their fate and families cook gobs of food and regret the leftovers. However, I am NOT going to write another T-day blog post or tell you the thousandth thing I am thankful for...besides that would be way too obvious and easy.

I have a rebellious streak anyways.

Right now, I am suspended between feeling grateful and feeling grumpy to the point that writing about this is the safest way to deal with this dangling dilemma. And I need to face it.

Here's the story:
    Over the past 3 years, I have grown in my gratitude, become more mindful of when I am taking something or someone for granted and making sure I check my heart for sincerity here. I don't want to live with ingratitude for what God did and has done for me and not be thankful for the generosity of Him and other people. I want to be a woman who understands/acknowledges the blessings, grace and goodness she has received and to cherish those.

This would be easier if I weren't human and could be content in all situations...

So guess what happens to sneak itself into my life recently?

 1Thessalonians 5:18. 

"Give thanks in all circumstances for this is God's will for you."

I'll admit that the first time I read this (a few plus years back) that I stumbled,
but I am not desiring to take this verse out of context. I don't believe that God is asking us to be thankful for bad things...like being in the middle of a stomach bug or miscarriage or some horrific news and to be honest, I don't think I have 100% sincerely given thanks in these past circumstances: A suicide, my mom's sudden death, and some abuse.  

I see this verse as personal to each individual. Gratefulness just can't be bought or forced. We have to get there through God working in our hearts in the situations that are his "will for" us.

Am I alone though in wanting a break from the molding, the shaping...the metamorphosis of thy heart?

See, two in my family are waiting for a diagnosis.  Probably not life threatening as long as they have the right type, but nonetheless a syndrome that has affected and will affect their lives.

One half of my heart is grateful because a diagnosis is an answer! It reveals, clarifies, and explains so much. Unfortunately, depending on the diagnosis, it could be downright scary and well, waiting is part of the game and I ain't so grateful for that...waiting is stressful. Yet, in the waiting, we continue to grow in the patience arena. However, this syndrome is a change in our family with limitations, proneness to not so fun stuff and well it will be our fifth major transition since we moved to Grand Junction 3 years ago! Ugh, transitions are just plain tough.

Do you see my conundrum? My heart swings back and forth from thank you and no thank you.
Well, I never said I wasn't a work in progress!

When all of this comes to light, I do believe we will see healing, I have faith we will make it through.

In the meantime, would you pray for our family?  

Happily linking up here:

FMF: How I want to fly

The unrealistic me wishes for one day I could fly. 

Not in an airplane. 

I want to put my arms up like Superman and hang out with the clouds. And like this super hero, I would just circle the earth over and over to turn back time...embrace my mam-maw and mom one more time.

Then, back to present time, take off and speed along to satisfy my desperate longing to see my sister

and my other sister 

(who isn't blood, but knows more about me than most.) 

and

because I need laughter and biblical wisdom from 

Heather over chocolate as her cat finds my lap irresistible. 

And before the day is done, I want to fly above Mount Everest, see the Northern lights and end the day watching God create another brilliant pink/purple dusk.

This is how I want to fly.

Linking up today at Lisa-Jo's for another Five Minute Friday inspiration. Come  and join us here

I am a beautiful mess (Part two)

Today, I am feeling more beautiful than messy.
This is good, right?  I can't lie...my house and portions of my life to a degree are a mess. I seriously need to get floor cleaner and mop. At least I vacuumed, but I swear that the laundry and groceries have it out for me. I. Can. Never. Seem. To. Catch up!

BUT...I had a great morning with the Lord...he is the author of my beauty. And I am grateful.

I also have been trying to figure out how to embrace the story of who I am-past, present, future. How I am to share that this year with others and at MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers).

I tend to think of beauty in outside terms and I believe most people do too. However, I don't want that to ever be my message. For the record, I am not talking about ditching sunscreen or lotion, or bathing (good hygiene and no skin cancer is a good thing), but if we are "ugly" on the inside than no amount of beauty or taking care of our outside selves will win us friends...and it will not shine Christ.

I came across a random article and reflection paper among some old MOPS materials and realized that embracing my story is embracing God's purpose for me, embracing how he sees me. I am not who I am randomly. Oh, how beautifully orchestrated we all are.
  Then, I realized that to do this I have to understand both the human and spiritual side of my story. I need to understand aspects of my personality, my natural tendencies, how I was raised, understanding my God given spiritual gift(s) and looking at specific experiences and circumstances mixed with what God was doing in that moment.

UM, this is not at all easy. Okay, I have been doing this for the

past 10 years as I have taken a plethora of tests, read books, deepened my 

relationship with God, etc., but it is painful and time-consuming. Yet

it is freeing and has been worth it. 

The most interesting discovery? My personality exists in only 3 percent of the population...this explains a lot for me. 

 So where does one start?

Go  Here to learn more about my personality type and Visit here 
to learn about your personality type. (I promise I am not endorsing or receiving any form of compensation for the links I am providing...this website and test, to me is the most specific and accurate of all the tests I have taken sans the spiritual gifts test).
 

I am a beautiful mess: Part one

I am a mess. I don't always feel beautiful. In fact, if I have no place to go, I don't go out of my way to look beautiful. Ya know, no make-up, hair unwashed or if washed-tucked behind the ears or in a pony tail.

I am a mess-right now! Always, but I don't show it to everyone. Isn't that human? We can't be vulnerable with everyone. Can you imagine how interesting or bizzaro (I know, not a word) our world would be if we walked around being vulnerable with everyone?

IF we shared our REAL story. Chose a little more rawness over reserved? 

I have been trying this for so long now and let me tell you that generally most people DON'T welcome it. They want the abridged version. They don't have time. I can relate.

We really can't hear everyone's deeper story. 

Honestly, I WANT to hear everyone's deeper stories. I am intrigued, inspired

and well, curious. I just don't have time.

AND, God didn't create all of us to be counselors 24/7 and we can't be everything to everyone...though I have been guilty of trying. You know you have tried it too.

So how do we solve this? How do we discern when we should encourage others to share or when we  should go beyond being informed to being more involved...to hearing and responding with action to those around us?

What came to my heart was this answer: Are you being selfish or self-less or serving? Hmmm...

I doubt God ever wants us to be selfish. And it isn't about being self-less. It is about less self and serving. I hear this as it coming down to discernment. Praying and listening and trusting God in every relationship and circumstance. It is being hyper-aware of what God is doing in our lives. Is this relationship in our life one where God is asking us to serve Him and them and not ourselves? Or is it one where we need to take caution and NOT share much or only listen?

Oh, you should see the inside of me right now. These thoughts above mixed with my human self look like a bunch of tangled up wires. It is a mess. I don't have it all figured out...this is where the messy part comes in...in you missed it. 

I truly crave deeper relationships...it is how I was made. Okay, yes, being a woman is part of the deal. 

Anyways, would love to hear your thoughts! So please share.

WANTED: 50 and older because you ARE that important...

If you are 50 and older, I have to tell you how important you are to me...to the world. To those of us currently without our grandparents or mothers (me) or we have a very strained relationship with our dad (me, again).

Perhaps, you don't desire to be a mother, grandparent, etc. to non-family around you, but before you hang up your hat on that, let me tell you how valuable you really are (not including how God sees you which you gotta ask him about that).

There are those of us that need, no-crave your wisdom, insight, affection, heck, even your attention. You possess a stability. Deep down, we know you didn't live the first 50 years without trials! Your strength from having made it through needs to be told. We need those stories of triumph and heartache to inspire and encourage us to keep going.

Most of you are parents and although we don't likely desire unsolicited advice on parenting, we still need your support, we desperately seek your understanding and yes, your free babysitting availability!

Some of us really love that you make getting older seem charming and less scary. When I look at how you handle gray hairs, a few extra pounds or pesky wrinkles-an awe escapes my lips and I breathe a bit easier. Getting old is not the end of life...

I've heard on more than one occasion from you, 

"I loved turning 50. I felt like my life was truly beginning."

I don't know what that means so I need you to explain it. And if your life is truly beginning-does that mean you stop being engaged or involved with youth? With young adults or a 39 year old like me?

Please tell me the answer is no! We need you! We need you...to listen without judgement. To not talk down to us because we aren't where you are at and please don't dismiss us! Okay, some don't show you the respect you so deserve, but don't give up on us. We need your love.

Let me tell you how you impact the world with examples from my experiences...

1. She isn't my grandmother, but my Mamaw was her best friend. She is 80 something, her health is declining and yet, she still  traveled out of state to come meet my children! The gesture alone...as I type this, tears are hanging in my eyes. (Love. Sacrifice).

2. She sees me differently than I thought. She has taught for 25+ years. An amazing, wise, now retired teacher. She told me, "You taught me so much." Huh? How could I teach her? She showed me ways to improve my teaching...surely not the other way around? (Encouragement. Humility).

3. They treated me like their grandchild. They paid for my college bill so I could get a Masters in Education. THEY loved me and even when they had cancer...they asked about me! She stroked my head and hand despite suffering. In pain, she wasn't just thinking about herself.

(Love, truly selfless love. Mercy. Generosity).

4. When my mother died, they swooped in with hugs, open ears and they came to her funeral. They barely knew her. They let me cry even if it made them uncomfortable. They have prayed over me and for me. She has spoken scripture to me more than once. They are there for birthdays and just because moments too. They are amazing in-laws and wonderful grandparents to my children.

 (Hope, kindness, love, compassion, inspiration. Examples of godliness).

5. She is my best friend's mom, but she treats me like I am one of hers. She writes me letters. She tells me I am a good mom. She makes me laugh and she has seen me grow from an awkward middle- schooler to a woman. She loves me. (Acceptance, forgiveness, love and understanding).

6. My home wasn't always safe. Her home was. She offered it. She didn't ask for details or something in return...she just opened her door and heart. (Safety. Comfort. Refuge.).

 Did you catch how prevalent love was in my experiences? 

It is hard to put into words how much these people's actions both verbal or not have meant to me.

If you are 50 and older and reading this-get and stay involved. Know that what you are doing matters. Please serve. Whether that means doing something like vacation Bible school, or Sunday school, watching our kids for a day or more, caring for kids at MOPS, offering your home as a place of safety and refuge for those whose homes aren't safe and or simply just listening.

We need you...really we do! 

And...thank you!

Sharing this post over at Jen's wonderful blog,  Soli De Gloria

Gratefulness, sickness and Free Will isn't an obstacle...

I'm gonna praise God first and then below you will see my Hannah (Biblical Sarah's nemesis) sized temper tantrum after that...

-God healed my friend's Placenta Abruption, but baby will probably be born early because my dear friend is already 3 cm and 90% effaced. Yet, baby is already 4.4 lbs at 32 weeks and healthy thus far. Praise! The Lord is carrying my friend and his creation.

-The Lord helped me finish my MOPS year strong...he continues to deeply change my perspective and patience on how waiting is good, trust shouldn't be an option and that as God is faithful so my faith deeps. Can I get a Hallelujah, amen?

And of course, my veggies are growing, I have two sweet boys, a hubby who treats me well and loves me, a home, and all my true needs met...shouldn't my praise never cease?

So why do I complain below? I am human and I love and care deeply.

NOW for my brattiness ( I don't care if that isn't a word):
                  -Someone in my family has had trouble getting pregnant and no one understands and well, they've told us that they have seen why God has made them wait, but I admit that I understand their struggle and now none of us get why they are waiting (2 years) and possibly longer. I want to see  them blessed with a child and I find my self begging God and teary-eyed for them.

I AM SO OVER SICKNESS and health issues that as I type this I role my eyes and question if I am a sitting duck since hubby has had the flu (one not covered with the vaccine) since Wed. night and I will get to enjoy this misery in a few days? UGH!!! Hubby had a 24 day headache that he just fixed only to be plagued by the flu, but he is in his second year as a teacher (all teachers are nodding in understanding right now).
   Hubby has seriously been sick, some of which was food-induced headaches and nausea since October. Nope, not kidding. Of course, may I add that I got sick and so did my kids over Christmas and it lasted a month for all of us with two of us on antibiotics?

 ********

Then, I realize how powerful prayer is...how life is just hard and why anyone wouldn't hand over at least some of life's hurdles to a loyal, loving God is beyond me. The fact that my friend and family member can still say (despite scary, hard stuff) God is good, still follow him and trust Him shows me that prayer and true faith is powerful. 

Then, I read about the Lord, and somehow, I come to this understanding that I have at times believed that prayer isn't as powerful as I think it is. What a lie! How can I believe that when I have seen 

it's power?

Oh, my heart and head are traders, thieves...

Then, God speaks to me and I admit that I know why I struggle and I feel his grace once again. My brother and dad...they haven't changed...actually my relationship with them and their choices have actually gotten worse, not better. That's it. I see impossible and I fly a kite called, doubt. 

Another whisper:

Free Will is not an obstacle for Me.

Somehow, I forget that although we always have a choice, that doesn't stop God from intervening or pursuing us. Think of Paul, God struck him with blindness (no choice there), but of course Paul had a choice to respond to God (free will). He could have ignored the flash of light on the road to  Damascus. Who says that God won't flash a light or "blind" my brother or father? Why do I limit God as if free will is some wall in God's way? Really, where do I get this false stuff ?

Mark 10:27 says, "With man this is impossible, but not with God, because nothing is impossible for God."

No. Thing. Is. Impossible. For.God!

I feel faith and hope increasing in my head and heart.

  


Linking up with Soli De Gloria. Go to findingheaventoday.com 
and join the party.
     

Sad, where I am strong is where I am weak too.

I am not sure what the problem is I just know that I feel sad. Okay, I know a little...

Change. I feel it coming. See this is where I am strong and yet, where I am weak at the same time. Does this not contradict? If you don't know me well, this is typical. I tend to clash myself. I am a Gemini. No, I don't believe in that literally, but I seriously am divided in certain areas of my life.

Change=weak=strong.

Here's why:

I like change because it makes life interesting. It keeps me from 

feeling bored. It can be exciting and adventurous. It means God is about to reveal a piece of his plan or use me.

Then, the other side of me loathes it. Words such as transition, new, waiting, loneliness,

unfamiliarity, and out-of-your-comfort zone come to mind and I want to run away 

with fingers in ears.

That last line seriously shows my bratty, scared kid side. Oh, well, my blog is all about being real and raw so at least I am keeping up with that huh?

I am sad because one of the changes that is coming isn't actually about me, but it affects me. It hurts.

Then, there is the change I can't stop or hold onto that is dangling in front of my face and taunting me. There's change that is about sacrifice and it is necessary, but it doesn't make it easy.

I need the Father to really hold my head and heart. I ask the Father to hold those whom the change is affecting far greater than me. I am praying for God sized courage and enthusiasm as I fasten my seat belt once again for this ride called, life.

What about you? What do you do with change that is inevitable? What changes do you feel weakest? Where do you feel strong?

Linking up at Soli Deo Gloria

Tripping Women (3 ways we do and how to stop)

I don't intentionally stick my foot out to trip other women, but it happens. Not on purpose.  Sometimes I am just being me and sometimes it is literally who I am physically that causes another woman to stumble. Or when they brag or I brag or when they share or I share-just a tiny too much...our insecurities and emotions collide until what's leftover is one colossal mess.  Where's the love, huh?
AND we say men are competitive? Um, well, this is hard to admit, but us ladies like to strut
our peacock feathers too (yes, I went there)!

So I write this message today because the more I open myself up to other women, the more I find bruised hearts and elbows needing bandaging. I am discovering how painful it is sometimes to be friends with women and that if we choose, one by one, we can stop tripping each other. We always have a choice.

So here are three ways I think we trip others and what to do instead:

1. Our voice. Ugh, our comments leave much to be desired don't they? Our statements can make another woman feel compelled to duck and cover to survive the verbal vomiting.  Okay, I have been known to let the motor mouth run way, way too much. We need "think before you speak tape" that magically appears when we need to keep our statements to ourselves. It is absolutely okay to not express our opinion and to not tell someone something you shouldn't. Gossip is a killer tripper.

2. Our false and negative assumptions- ANY time we believe something about someone without proof, or getting to know them...well, we've made something true that probably isn't. When we peg people as this way or that, we take away their freedom and ours to be ourselves. For example, we assume a mom is a terrible parent because her child is choosing to have a melt down in the middle of the store. When we assume, we judge and we destroy the essence of relationship. I find that almost 99.9 percent of the time, my beliefs about another person's intentions, what they do or don't eat, lifestyle, parenting, etc. is dead wrong!

3. Comparing- You know the stare down she gives you. You know the "this is how I do it" tone. You know the comments on how little or how much food is on your plate or the "you must exercise everyday" statements. Us women (including me, gulp) are horrible at feeling insecure when a thinner, tighter bummed, perfectly flowing hair woman crosses our path...we can either not let it bother us, or we feel bad about ourselves. We know our man noticed because if he didn't than he must have had something in his eye! This is just a problem ladies. And pretty, thin women are not to blame. Okay, now if you are fortunate to be a "looker" I would kindly appreciate it if you wouldn't display so boldly your uh-hums so that my hubby would trip on them too. Modesty doesn't have to mean old-fashioned moth-ball living.

-Where's the grace and love that this insecure, broken and imperfect world needs? That is the solution to this tripping we all keep doing to one another. My closest friends are my closest friends because they give me SO much grace and love. They let me be me and I let them be them.
   We don't let any green-eyed monsters stand in the way of honest to awesome friendship. Let's face it, us women NEED each other. God created us to love and if we aren't careful about tucking our feet in more often, then we are just hurting others daily-on purpose or not.
     So practicing the art of loving others to me is the best cure for the stumbling we create with each other.

Your thoughts?
What has someone done to cause you to trip? How can you show love today, right now?


Linking up today with Jen and other SDG awesome women at SDG

Something "different" I ate-then and now

It's been awhile since I've linked up here.

I chose writing prompt #5-Something you ate

I grew up in the south. Our family table was greeted often with items smothered in bacon grease. We often had meat at every meal...usually pork or beef.  I look back now and call it clogged arteries on a plate. 

When I moved out, went to college and eventually got married, I decided what to eat and cook. Bacon grease was rarely on the menu. My grandfather and a few other family members had passed away or had heart problems. I didn't want to be a part of that fact on our family tree. So, I began to make changes...SLOWLY.

Southern food=addicting. 

 More recently, I am mostly vegetarian and vegan-NOT because I am all about how animals are not for eating, but for two reasons:  

1. hubby is plagued by food that triggers headaches and sometimes nausea.  And he has problems with eating beef.

2. I have seen how they cut up a cow and it has grossed me out ever since, I don't like how most meat smells, and bonus-I don't really have to worry about E-coli unless I eat items grown in animal manure (can you say gross?).

 

So we have been eating some "different" things that I seriously would have said in my twenties that I would never eat!  

     Recently, the weirdest food I have tried is nutritional yeast or nooch as vegans affectionately call it. 

Nooch is often used as a cheese substitute...interesting, but it just ain't cheese folks! One thing that keeps me non-vegan is my love of cheese-especially on pizza. No, I don't have to have cheese on everything and most meals I make don't have it, but when I think about never having pizza with Mozzarella, I feel a panic attack coming on. 

The best things I have consumed recently? Coconut milk coffee creamer-hello coffee! And Vanilla Almond milk. Talk about heaven in my spinach/banana smoothie or my rice or oatmeal breakfast.  

So there ya have it, something I ate then and now. Bon appetite! 

Stupid food, when you cringe and joy.

Anyone else wonder what's up with my title?  It just doesn't go together, right?

I am a multitasking mama-I couldn't quit juggling my thoughts long enough to put one down so I decided to include all three (big, trying to look cute, forgive me grin).

Food is stupid. I mean dealing with food. Stupid. Hubby has migraines and sometimes nausea from a lot of not so whole, fresh food (read any thing unnatural, preservative/MSG lathered and laden). Lest I forget, there's oats, chocolate and beef  that all cause issues. So I broke down and bought a food processor. There's only so much STUPID hand chopping,slicing and dicing to do. Honestly, I love Garlic just not when my hands smell like it. No more teary eyes from cutting onions.  I hear some of you cheering. Now, I do have to say that I still love that I possess Miracle Blades and so cutting one item where I don't need a food processor is lovely.

Sometimes it's the machine's turn to do the dirty work. Hip-hip hooray...it sliced potatoes for baked not fried taters in seriously a matter of seconds! I am thinking that I will experience a new found giddyness before I realize that's what it is...blending my own nut butters or black bean burgers will be practically effortless. 
So all of this figuring out what items in a bag, can or box are acceptable to buy has become a chore and I might go blind from reading the labels. Nonetheless, at least there are some items. My newest hurdle has been what to cook, what to substitute, and well, what to eat. Too bad we can't live on junk mail as there seems to be an endless supply.

*****

OKAY...so you know when you cringe and experience joy simultaneously?..I feel like saying these are mutually exclusive, but I would be lying.

             Speaking in front of groups of people-now there's where I didn't look forward to it and then I did. Huh? I know it doesn't make sense.

Today, I am cringing at the steps, paperwork and plethora of meetings toward getting my first child into a good, safe school. Yet, I am experiencing moments of joy as I feel the Lord holding me. As I feel the effect of trusting Him...where I am not in control and I can't make things happen. Nope, no amount of influencing, planning, or strategic moves is gonna affect where my child goes to school.

Then, I relish in these moments of joy and peace. Knowing that my heart is okay when it feels two emotions at once. Knowing that the Lord who entrusted this first boy to me will protect him as he as always protected me. 

I see the grace. I strongly desire this joy and for the first time in my life, this year, I am understanding God's unspeakable joy...please don't let it end or I will cringe.

Home again, Home again...

Five Minute Friday of raw, unedited writing for five minutes straight. Link up and join us here

Home isn't where you hang your hat. It's where you hang your heart. The welcome mat is laid out no matter how long I've been away. No signs at the door to say, "closed" or "no vacancy" because this home, my home is always open. A place where memories are born and not just made.
We can drop our masks and be the human, beautiful mess we are and we are still loved.

   Pajamas, unkempt hair, forgiveness, laughter, coffee rings and tear stains adorn the rooms and home feels real and like a warm, cozy bed I can't help but jump into. I cling hard to this comfort and to this familiar.

Home isn't four walls full of perfection, but of imperfect people.  

These people, they are my home. 

   

My First Vlog (video)

Today, I am attempting my first Vlog or video on my blog. I am nervous. Please be kind!

Well, more "ums" that I wanted, but hey I can always improve, right?

Don't lurk...leave a message of your own struggles, or new things you are trying, a prayer request or a kind comment! Thank you for stopping by. 

What the current contents in my purse say about me...

I was in middle school when I carried my first purse. It was a neutral color with a long shoulder strap and not very big. I didn't carry much: a brush, mirror, coins because I rarely had any cash, Bubblicious Bubble gum (think 80's and blowing big bubbles) and a picture or two.

Ya know that joke where the older you get the bigger your purse gets? Well, in my case, it is more like the older I get the more stuff I haul around in my same-sized, medium purse! I just can't bring myself to buy a bigger purse. And so the purpose of my bag is no longer about feeling grown up or a fashion statement or to hold my driver's license and ya know, tampons. Yes, I used the "T" word.

The contents in my purse as I write this?...

The usual

A wallet, brush with hair-ties, keys, sunglasses, cell phone, a mirror, women stuff, receipts, and lip gloss.

The necessities when I launched my professional career

A pocket calendar, paper pad, pens, breath mints, Tylenol, hand sanitizer, oil blotting paper, lotion coupons/gift cards/ or point cards.

Surprise necessities...around 2007 

1. An Epi-pen for when a wasp or bee decides to sting me.

2. Powdered sunscreen or some organic kinds: My skin is allergic to something in most sunscreens available.

The I wouldn't have ever had this in my purse before kids contents:

     1. Crayons/Activity books-need I say more?

     2. Hand wipes (for sticky moments and the mysterious white crud around my kid's mouths). 

     3. Sugar packets...for those moments when an unhealthy need for a pick up arises, just kidding. The packets were actually for a cup of coffee I had and wanted to sugar it myself so it wasn't so sweet. They are still in there from a week ago.

     4. Tissue- snotty noses and boogers, of course.

     5. Band-Aides

     6. A pacifier (when they were younger) and now? A car or action figure!

     7. My kid's insurance cards/information for the doctor, etc.

     8. Snacks such as granola bars, bananas, or cheese sticks.

     9. Occasionally, a pair of socks, a diaper or gloves have taken a ride.

     10. A "Mona Lisa" flashlight. Yes, you read that right. I am artsy and it was a gift given to help me find items in my purse when it is dark and or to see the lock at my door when it is dark.

UM, now it is actually another toy to entertain the restless natives at the store.

So, as you can see, I am almost prepared for any kid-like or kid-inducing event! The days of the young woman trying to anticipate and be ready for the cute guy or to be efficient at work is long gone.  Enter the super-adapted momma...ready for gunk, stickiness, owies, germs, hubby's headaches, boredom, and hunger pangs. Ka-pow!

Okay, your turn...what do you have in your purse that well, you know you wouldn't have had even a year ago?